Let the past be the past. How easy is that to say, and how agonizingly difficult a task? Its easy to spend years trying to ignore the past and saying that it doesn't matter. The mind is always reaching back and dragging yesterdays mistakes and regrets into the present. It makes the present and the future impossible to truly reach. Its like trying to walk down a street staring backwards. You walk into a lot of things and progress is minimal. But how do you stop looking? Usually, I think most people find the best way to release its power is to face it. Usually with help. Start with writing down the mistakes, experiences, and people that haunt you. You need a thorough catalogue. Most people find you also need another person. I believe this is where most people usually slip up. We try to force the past out of our mind with sheer will. Our mind is usually just to powerful to see things objectively, to learn what is okay to let go. There is something truly magical about sharing these issues with another human being that seems to reduce their size and gravity. In the confines of our mind the past is confusing, infuriating, and sticky. With a solid accounting we can present these issues to a close friend, a counselor, a pastor, etc. Often what we find is that just the willingness to look at them is the crucial ingredient. Once they are in the light and seen by a trusted confidant they become a little lighter. It is only in fully immersing oneself that we can transcend them, and one needs great courage and willingness for this. The irony is that the longer we dodge it the more we tend to repeat it, in long and painful circles. This is not inevitable. Gear yourself up, find the resources you need, and take the leap.